Fucking Chiggers
2004-06-06, 11:09 p.m.

For the last half hour, I have been pain-stakingly painting clear nail polish over the 78 chigger bites on my legs and the one chigger bite on my armpit.

For those who don't know, chiggers are microscopic mites that basically eat minute amounts of liquified human skin and then drop off and go on their merry way.

Unfortunately, they leave behind unbelieably itchy yet relatively small welts. And amazingly enough, the clear nail polish does stop the itch. I really need to have more faith in my sister.