The All-American Heros
2002-11-18, 1:55 p.m.

I was a tomboy when I was little. I played with GI Joes which were about ten thousand times cooler than any Barbie available.

I also watched the GI Joe cartoon. Which as it turns out, was not a good thing.

There was one episode where this old lady decided to try and steal Lady Jaye's youth and beauty.

The old lady had some sort of set of machines that would steal the youth and beauty of the young and beautiful. As far as I can remember, the machines looked like the machine in The Fly.

The old lady would be in one machine and Lady Jaye would be in the other and the machine would swap their outward appearances.

But the GI Joe's were smarter than the old lady and they foiled her plan by saving Lady Jaye at the last moment.

Since there was no one to swap appearances with, the old lady came out of the machine without a face.

I had nightmares for weeks because of that damn show...I was convinced that I was going to wake up without a face.